I met a real live Hollywood actress once. I won’t mention her name because that would be ungentlemanly. OK, it was Kate Jackson from “Charlie’s Angels.” Please give me a moment to explain to the young that Charlie’s Angels was a TV show before Drew Barrymore knew the difference between cocaine and Coca-Cola. Anyway, Kate was a truly beautiful woman, But, I was struck by one small thing. Lord, this woman was skinny!
Now I have been happily married to a skinny woman for the better part of four decades. The difference is that my wife is “small town” skinny. In Hollywood and New York, they have skinny women. But they are unnaturally skinny. Deep down in your soul you know it is a “skinny” borne out of trips to the bathroom when they don’t really need to go, if you know what I mean.
Small town women stay skinny because they have a need to take care of everybody. When my wife and I went to McDonald’s on a date, she would order and they would ask if I was the bus driver. She would eat up a week’s wages I made at the cotton mill and never gain an ounce. To this day she puts salt on everything except Cheerios. Blood pressure? Not a chance! She’s too busy taking care of me and everybody else to get something as self-indulgent as that.
To this very day, I see those Hollywood skinny women on “Desperate Housewives” and I know what they’re desperate for. Dessert…lots and lots of dessert. Sitting next to me will be my small town skinny woman, thinking I am all hot and bothered by those women on the screen. She is right, of course. But when it comes right down to the facts of the matter, I wouldn’t trade my small town skinny girl (she controls her weight these days by chasing the grandkids) for all the sirens and she-devils in Hollywood.
I don’t care where you call home, take my advice. Get yourself a small town skinny girl…if only for the second-helpings at dinner time.
photo courtesy istolethetv
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